Why is it that I only seem to remember the dreams that scared the ever-lovin’ shit of me? It seems that I’m constantly dreaming at night, yet, when I wake up I have only the vaguest notion what they were about.
At the age of ten, I underwent my third operation on my left eye to correct a condition known as “strabismus” or muscular asymmetry. The operation was to be performed in Kansas City, 200 miles from my home. I was too young to remember the first two procedures but, at the age of 10, it took all the gumption I could muster to “take it like a man”.
In those days, the anesthetic of choice for children was ether. Without conscious pre-planning, my last defense against this assault on my state of consciousness was to hold my breath. As I recall, the procedure involved sprinkling the liquid ether onto something held over my nose and mouth. Being highly volatile, the ether would quickly evaporate, meaning that the anesthesiologist would have to apply more of the liquid. Later, I learned that it took 2-3 times the normal dose of ether to put me under. The consequences were far more terrifying that I could ever imagine. The one image I have of that immediate experience is being on the top of a roller-coaster a mile high and just starting the plunge into the abyss, surrounded by a mustard yellow sky.
But the worst was yet to come. Once home again, I began to have the worst nightmares of my life. For four or five nights, I was terrified to go to sleep because the dreams were so horrible. At first, I was pursued by gargoyle-like monsters. I could escape them by flying and perching on high-tension wires, where I could look down on them. But later, I was confined to the ground and was chased by monstrosities through the basement of our church and, then, up a three-story staircase to a door behind which I knew I would meet a horrible demise.
After awhile, I came to the point where I was conscious of knowing that, if I could only force my eyes open, the nightmare would come to an end. And it worked.
Shortly thereafter, the horror stopped. Ether is no longer used as the principle means to put children to sleep. We should all sleep better knowing that is a fact.
© 10 November 2014
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