Catholic Religion – Sage Telling Your Story

So just to be safe I might advise everyone sitting near me around the table to move to a safer space just in case. The reason for this is that I am beginning this piece on EVIL with a biblical quote and I would not want anyone to be smote by a lightning bolt on account of my atheist ass.

“Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins.” James 4:17

Particularly in grades one through eight when I was most intensely in the clutches of the Catholic Church 24/7 it seemed I was steeped in the seemingly endless ways I could sin or do evil. There were two broad categories of sin as I recall, those of “commission” and then those of “omission”. Being a good little Catholic boy I went to confession usually twice a month with the focus of my confessing being almost entirely on my seemingly endless sins of commission. In hindsight it seems that the Church overly focused on actual transgressions rather than on the “omissions”. Or maybe this was a refection of my own internal turmoil generated by the difficulty and shame of confessing to cussing, fighting with siblings or disobeying my parents as opposed to confessing a lack of efforts to help the overseas Catholic Missions save heathen souls with my meager monetary allowance.

To be fair the Church did say that faith alone was not adequate, you need some good works to go along with it. To not perform these acts of goodwill I suppose could be construed as sins of omission. Though I do not remember the emphasis on omissions being nearly as strong as the admonition to keep my hands off of my dick and the resulting emissions.

And of course when I had reached my early adolescent years the thought of confessing to anyone that I was masturbating daily was simply out of the question. That I was thinking about men much older than I when I was engaged in this ‘transgressive commission” was truly beyond the pale, and so began a slow decline into being an agnostic and then a full-blown atheist. I guess playing with oneself is the root of all evil.

To once again quote Ken Wilber’s truthful bromide “no one is wrong 100% of the time” this seems the case for the Catholic Church’s teaching around sins of omission. As I age I realize that I actually commit very few sins but the issue of omission becomes much more relevant and something I am frequently guilty of.

Over the decades I have been attracted to Buddhism primarily the Zen variety. I find their views on good and evil to be a bit more dare I say sophisticated and in line with the complexity that is human behavior. I recently stumbled on a piece written on Good and Evil and posted on the Soka Gakkai International site: http://www.sgi.org/about-us/buddhism-in-daily-life/good-and-evil.html

A short quote from that piece I think has a rather uncomfortable truth to it:

“Every single human being is capable of acts of the most noble good and the basest evil”.

I am also reminded of Thich NhatHanh wonderful poem, Please Call Me By My True Names, and the amazing stanza:

“ I am the twelve year old girl,
refugee on a small boat
who throws herself into the ocean
after being raped by a sea pirate.
And I am the pirate
My heart not yet capable
Of seeing and loving.”

So for me these days I think I am guilty of sins of omission when I am not actively engaging in resistance hopefully through acts of compassion. This does not necessarily only involve political actions, which can have merit but also present traps of their own. Acting compassionately and politically at the same time is often a challenge.

For me it is a sin of omission to not be out marching and demonstrating and certainly not voting. The sins of omission I currently am guilty of though most often involve rather mundane day-to-day activities.

I need to engage more with some of the homeless I encounter daily maybe give them a few bucks, or call a friend for lunch or reach out to an old buddy trying to contact me on Facebook. Perhaps help an older friend get moved out of his apartment or get off my ass and write something and then just show up at Story Telling to listen to what everyone has to share.

About the Author

I was born in La Porte, Indiana in 1949, raised on a farm and schooled by Holy Cross nuns. The bulk of my adult life, some 40 plus years, was spent in Denver, Colorado as a nurse, gardener and gay/AIDS activist. I have currently returned to Denver after an extended sabbatical in San Francisco, California.

On seeing this topic for today’s Story Telling Group the
first thing that popped into my head was how often I hear the word “sorted”
spoken on the several English and occasionally Australian shows, often murder
mysteries, I watch on Netflix. I was
left to wonder if the phrase “sorting it out” is just not the American version.

Checking the Urban Dictionary,
the number one definition for “sorted” was using it in reference to be
completing a task or an idea. For example, I have got it “sorted” mate or will
you “sort” that for me mate. I must say I much prefer hearing “sort or sorted” in
an English accent than I do the mundane mid-western American version: “I’ll
sort that out for you”.

There are also many other, some much more colorful, definitions
of “sorted” that are apparently part of British slang. For example, it can mean
to be under the influence of Ecstasy or that one’s class A recreational drugs
have arrived or perhaps my favorite usage getting fucked up but not to the
point of blacking out. I am sorted!

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sorted

I will now make a sharp left turn and return to the specific
phrase “sorting it out” and how this may have relevance in my current life.
Though I am relatively comfortable with my lack of belief in a god or gods,
which I guess, makes me an atheist, I do at times get a bit squishy with this
world-view and fall back on maybe being an agnostic. The word agnostic conjures
up a phrase used by the Korean Zen Master Seung Sahn “Only Don’t Know”. His use
was, I am sure, more sophisticated than my superficial view around whether or
not there is a god, but I can honestly say when pondering the Universe and how
the hell we all got here I really “only don’t know”.

To be very honest though I am still sorting this “god-thing”
out. Oh, I have absolutely no problem throwing out the overwhelming mythical
teachings of all the world’s great monotheistic religions, Hinduism and even
much from certain Buddhist schools. In hindsight it was harder to give up a belief
in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny than it was to jettison many of the tenets
of the Catholic Religion I was indoctrinated in.

Those original questions Harry Hay used in helping to
challenge and flesh-out our queer identity, that of our being a real cultural
minority he believed, seem pertinent for me today in “sorting it out”: Who are we, where did we come from, and what
are we for.

Questions it seems that can easily be expanded beyond just
coming to grips with and adding meaning and substance to being gay.

Which brings me to why I am reading two books currently. Both
are by men who have been intellectual, and dare I say Spiritual, influences on
me over the years. These are authors I
have read seeking answers on this whole supreme-being thing or a more
sophisticated question perhaps being: Is evolution, not only of life on earth
but of the ever-expanding Universe as a whole, really spirit in action and what the hell are the implications of that,
for me of course.

The first book is by Stephen Batchelor and is titled Secular Buddhism – Imagining the Dharma in
an Uncertain World (Stephen is also the author of Buddhism Without Beliefs and Confessions
of a Buddhist Atheist among others) and the second is The Religion of Tomorrow by Ken Wilber. Wilber’s book clocks in at
806 pages with relatively small print and no pictures. So, if this tome
provides guidance for me in “sorting it out” don’t expect an update for
probably at least six months and most likely much longer.

Actually, I am most likely reading both of these books
because I am just a lazy fuck looking for a short cut – an answer to the
question of what is our true nature and that of the whole amazing Universe.
Both Wilber and Batchelor have decades of very disciplined meditative practice
informing and guiding their views. I on the other hand have spent more cushion
time than the average bear but in comparison to these two guys my effort is
like a single grain of sand on the beach. All of this reading of course may
well be folly if I am not willing to do the work. I wonder sometimes what is
‘faith’ really but a con foisted on folks i.e. no need to do the work just
accept our word for it and it will all be fine.

“Stay tuned to this space.” — Rachel Maddow

About the Author

I was born in La Porte Indiana in 1949, raised
on a farm and schooled by Holy Cross nuns. The bulk of my adult life, some 40
plus years, was spent in Denver, Colorado as a nurse, gardener and gay/AIDS
activist. I have currently
returned to Denver after an extended sabbatical in San Francisco, California.

Tag: Catholic Religion

Evil, by Pat Gourley

About the Author

Sorting It Out, by Pat Gourley