Teachers, by Phillip Hoyle

Teachers: I’ve had a lot of them. Some I recall for their
names, others for their engaging communications, still others for the lack of
impact they made on me. From grade school I recall Miss Weenes whom we second
graders called Miss Weenie, although not in class, and Mrs. Schaffer who read
“Treasure Island” to us, my first novel; there were others whose names escape
me, but I do recall the woman who taught us cursive writing in fifth grade leaving
me with a rather readable hand and the rather effeminate man who taught music
in fourth and fifth grades introducing us to Bizet’s “Carmen.” From junior high
I recall Mr. Moon who at the board always pointed with his middle finger and
who told memorable stories about science, Miss Oliver who taught Latin not only
to me but to my older sisters and to my mother, the effective algebra teacher who
also taught my mom and started geraniums in the windows of her classroom, and
Miss Costello who sent home a mustard plaster recipe when too many students got
colds. From high school I remember Mr. Martin the choir director, Mr. Snodgrass
the band director, Miss Perkins the Latin teacher and drama coach, and Mr. Unruh
the football coach and government teacher. In college, I remember Dr. Van Buren,
President Lown, Mr. Secrest, and Professor Jamie Morgan; in graduate school,
Mrs. Kiesgen and Dr. Lee; in seminary Dr. Duke, Dr. Routt, Dr. Hoehn, and Dr.
Rowell. But that’s only the beginning of the list. I also had music teachers in
piano and voice studios, art teachers at the Oklahoma Art Workshops, leaders of
numerous seminars and workshops at hotels and conference centers, and informal
mentors whose revelations and advice paved the way for a rich life of learning,
work, and enjoyment. Trying to list all my teachers indicates I learned many
things from many different instructors over a long life. I owe a lot to these
people.
Mother taught us kids to respect our teachers although she
well knew they had feet of clay. She supported them through her tireless work
in the PTA but also challenged them when their behavior overstepped their role
of teacher and nurturer of young people. So when I heard harangues from the
pulpit that some faithless people scandalously thought of Jesus as only a
teacher, I felt unsettled. Mom taught us that being a teacher was one of the
very best occupations anyone could pursue. Of course, those preachers were
defending the orthodox doctrine of the divinity of Christ. I was not concerned with
orthodoxy and thought if Jesus back then or as a spiritual presence could teach
anyone, he could be my teacher as well and earn my deepest respect. Like Mom, I
liked my teachers. Two, though, stand out as the most influential: the first
for inspiration, the second for technique.
I knew Dr. James Van Buren by reputation long before I got
to school and took his demanding class, “Survey of Biblical Literature.” After
that there were other classes in biblical studies, philosophy, theology, sociology,
and literature. Studying in a small college, I got to make a rather thorough
study of this professor who was both the hardest one to get good grades from
and the one who opened worlds of knowledge most widely. I can say confidently
that Dr. Van taught me how to run successfully on the liberal edge of
conservatism. By ‘successfully’ I mean not only getting beyond political
hurdles but also doing so while maintaining theological self-respect and
integrity. He taught me to read broadly, to think openly, and to communicate
creatively. For instance, he lectured on Christian humanism, Christian
hedonism, Christian stoicism, and Christian Epicureanism insisting that
Christian thought was not a complete philosophy in itself but a base from which
one examined and utilized perspectives of the ages. He taught humor as an
essential ingredient in the most serious communications and sex as a broadly
celebrative dynamic of life. In Dr. Van’s approach God as the creator and
approver of creation served as the starting point and essential part of a
healthy approach to life, morality, and ethics. He insisted that creative and
playful thinking stands as a necessary component in one’s life and insisted
religion should never become a wooden legal transaction or set of rigid laws.
He taught an appreciation for beauty through arts, literature, science, and everyday
interactions with fancy and plain people. Poetry, storytelling, drama, and
lively insights transformed theology into a process for living. The arts
pointed to dynamic creativity in the name of the Creator.
This overweight professor rested a little notebook on his
stomach as if it were a lectern. This enthusiastic professor lectured from the
book of Job on the dances of whales in the ocean, leaping about like one of
them himself. This insightful professor opened the way to Shakespeare, Milton, and
Whitman. This scholarly professor had been granted a DD and then earned a PhD
in English Literature, his dissertation an examination of Old Testament Apocryphal
references in John Milton’s poetry. This superlative teacher supported in me my
love for books and libraries and my proclivity toward creative thinking in
matters of education and religion. I continue to think about Dr. Van Buren’s
advice, knowledge, and approach whenever I try to solve problems or speak from
my own heart.
I knew Dr. Karen Bartman years before she was conferred a
doctoral degree in piano pedagogy. She served as the church’s music coordinator
and organist where I worked as associate minister and director of the Chancel
Choir. We made music together for several years before I studied in her piano
studio. I recall this teacher for both her pianistic and pedagogical techniques—carried
out with consistency, musical depth, and always the encouragement to keep
making beautiful music. I’ll never know if I could have learned piano technique
at an earlier age, but I did learn it in my late thirties under her tutelage.
When I approached my 40s crisis (a la Goldberg and Sheehe), I became
“angry with the gods of literature” as my friend Gerald put it and went on a yearlong
book fast. I joined Karen’s studio to learn to play piano, knowing I’d have
about three hours a day to practice, time I would not be reading books. I
remained a student in her studio for two and a half years. Since childhood I had
played—my father said banged—the piano but always with great limitation. Gerald
once said I was quite musical but had no technique. After two years of Karen’s
discipline I played a piece for my dad. He declared, “She’s a miracle worker;
you’re not pounding.” Even Gerald seemed impressed at her work and my response,
and Dr. Bartman said what she appreciated about teaching me—an adult—was that I
always played musically.
This physically fit teacher sat at the keyboard with
perfect posture and insisted I do so as well. This enthusiastic teacher with
beautifully strong hands didn’t just give me scales and arpeggios to strengthen
my hands but showed me how to execute them in ways that engaged listening,
phrasing, and trusting that my hands would know where they were on the
keyboard. This insightful teacher showed me how to ground myself at any point
in a phrase, a measure, or a beat giving life to the composition in
performance. This scholarly teacher helped me know Bach, Mozart, Brahms,
Schubert, Schumann, Chopin, Debussy, Mompou, Shostakovich, and Prokofiev in
ways I had never grasped even after extensive graduate study in musical style
analysis. This superlative teacher inspired me to practice with confidence that
I could play effectively and beautifully. Eventually I quit piano instruction
and returned to books and writing. Still, I continued to practice and put to
use my grasp of her technique when I played. From her I learned the value of
technical proficiency. Her consistent teaching encouraged me to continue to
develop as an artist and to bring artistry to bear in all my work.
In summary, Dr. Van Buren taught me to love life and the
arts, Dr. Bartman encouraged me to find consistent techniques for any creative
work I undertook. My life as a learner continues inspired and enabled by these
two great teachers. There have been plenty more teachers, loads of learning,
and lots of creative outcomes that today I celebrate along with this litany of my
teachers’ names.
© 1 Nov 2011 
About the Author 
Phillip Hoyle
lives in Denver and spends his time writing, painting, and socializing. In
general he keeps busy with groups of writers and artists. Following thirty-two
years in church work and fifteen in a therapeutic massage practice, he now
focuses on creating beauty. He volunteers at The Center leading the SAGE
program “Telling Your Story.”
He also blogs at artandmorebyphilhoyle.blogspot.com 

Writing is Like a Gondola Ride, by Carlos

Writing is an Exploration.
You start from nothing
and learn as you go….E. L.
Doctorow
Last
week when my husband Ron and I first boarded the Venetian-inspired gondola
intent on riding the canals of Fort Lauderdale, I felt a bit self-conscious.
After all, we are not overt crusaders of gay rights, instead changing the world
one grain of sand at a time. Yet, here we were about to draft a testament
declaring our emancipation. As sole passengers of our flat-bottomed boat decked
out in sensuous cushions, billowing curtains, and floral bouquets, we were making
an emotive and political statement about our right to love as our gondolier
guided us through the circuitous waterways. Tito, our gondolier, greeted us
warmly, taking pictures of the happy couple as we smiled in romantic bliss, I
probably smiling more like a shy bridegroom than a well-seasoned lover. At the
table next to a divan in which we reclined, we laid out a feast, cold English
ginger ale, honeyed matzo crackers, a disc of Boursin cheese flecked with
cracked black pepper, and strawberries with sensuous nipples begging to be tongued,
nibbled and devoured. Having requested classical romantic music, Chopin,
Debussy, Rachmaninoff, I soon discovered that the music wafted out into the
canals and walkways, enrapturing the world around us with love’s hymns. We made
an adorable couple, as we lounged and fed each other blissfully, basking in the
gentle heartbeats of lyrical watery refrains. 
The
gentle waves beneath us gurgled in a rhythmical flow as they massed and fell like
the breathing of my beloved sleeping under a field of stars keeping watch. The
gondola sliced through the water slow and steady, its bow knifing through the
glassy reflection and creating undulating waves measuring a beat out to shore.
The sound of the waters kissing the shoreline commingled with the soft strains
of piano and violins billowing around us. We nuzzled against each other, toasting
our relationship like a candle flame damning the night as we drifted off into
inner worlds so infrequently traversed. Visually, we could not get enough of Camelot;
with every turn, we were met by tiered pagodas crowned with brass finials, red-tiled
Mediterranean villas, and by expansive lush grounds populated by strutting
peafowl, colorful Muscovy ducks, and oblivious loons sauntering amidst Eden. Although
I subconsciously rebelled at the ostentatious wealth surrounding me, where
money built empires on the backs of the working class, at this particular moment
in time, I decided to suspend my political sensibilities, recognizing that my
own feet are often unwashed.
Around
us, the scarlet pendants of flamboyant blossoms dangled from leafy canopies
like ruby earrings worn by a royal Persian bride, contrasting with the rosy
fingers of the tenderly setting sun in the horizon. When the sea breezes tickled
them, coconut palms sashayed in unison, like a well-syncopated troupe performing
a choreographed repertoire. We drifted through the sun-dappled canals,
surrounded by a Crayola calliope of rainbow colors, citron, Bahama water blues,
egg yolk yellows, and the ever present shades of island paradise greens.
In
the downtown section of the canals, boatloads of tourists shared the waterway
with us. On the river walk, they sauntered along the meandering sidewalks graced
by restaurants, art galleries, and parkways. Ron and I noticed numerous interesting,
but for the most part gratifying, reactions to our presence in the slow-moving
gondola as we cuddled and kissed openly. Certainly, we were not attempting to
be the standard of a gay couple in love. We simply sought our rightful place as
two men standing before the altar of history.  Some people, especially older men with paunchy
bellies and Republican scowls on their face, simply ignored us as though choosing
to deny our presence by cloaking themselves in the vestments of moral
indignation. Some just gawked at us with an incredulous
did-we-really-see-what-we-thought-we-saw open-mouthed gape. However, most, and
especially the millennial generation, smiled and waved at us, clearly conveying
that despite the Scalias and Alitos slithering under their rocks, despite
homophobic political and religious ideologues, America is changing. Violators
of human rights may continue to reject our rights to love, refusing to condone
our way of life to justify their holier-than-thou prejudices, but America is
evolving as it comes to recognize that I love him and he loves me, and that’s
all that matters. Fortune has sided with those who dare!
Writing
is the equivalent of a gay couple gliding on a gondola scrutinized by the
world. Writing requires courage and conviction. It requires standing up against
the fear that we will divulge too much of our souls, placing ourselves in a
position of being misunderstood, judged, rejected. When we write, we open
ourselves up to the eyes of others, never knowing whether our creation, our
lives, our authentic voices will be validated or whether reviewers’ accusations
will have us shrivel up, becoming small and voiceless. Thus, to be a writer requires
taking risks, recognizing that fear has the potential to open up new venues,
new worlds, new ideals for the writer as well as for those fortunate enough to
be a part of the sacred journey. A writer needs to unleash her/his fears,
embrace his identity, and glide, not necessarily fearlessly, but with
conviction that only when he is true to himself, will others smile back and be
transformed. The writer himself shall be transformed. He will give himself
permission to sit on a beach and witness the rising of the sun; he will recline
upon the earth and in a blade of grass commune with the cosmos as it unfolds
majestically before him; he will dance with the stars above him, and know that
he originated from some deep longing out there, as well as within him. Writers
do not work in a vacuum. We are aware of the coconut palms’ calypso waltzes, of
the droplets of water that nourish the countless ancestors of our pasts as well
as the progeny of our futures. As Toni Morrison wrote, “all water has a perfect
memory and is forever trying to get back to where it was.”  As a writer, I capture, awkward and unevolved
as it may be, a moment of time, a beam of sunlight glistening on the surface, a
coiled blossom whose epicenter holds intangible truths. I am a wayfarer
blissfully celebrating as I glide  down
the currents that are but a Mobius strip of eternity. Writers are listeners and
observers and thus responsible for capturing moments that will dissipate as
quickly as a lifetime, but in surrendering to those moments, our explorations
come to an end, and we arrive where we started, recognizing the point where it
all began. Like all artists and philosophers, we embrace what and where we are,
we face our fears, swim the currents, and remind our fellow wayfarers that we
are all enlightened mediators on the canals in which we are carried. Therefore,
if my good reader will excuse me, I will return to the embrace of my beloved
word, knowing that the journey begins with a cadenced breath.
© 27 July 2015 – Denver
About
the Author 
Cervantes wrote, “I know who I am and who I may choose to be.”  In spite of my constant quest to live up to this proposition, I often falter.  I am a man who has been defined as sensitive, intuitive, and altruistic, but I have also been defined as being too shy, too retrospective, too pragmatic.  Something I know to be true. I am a survivor, a contradictory balance of a realist and a dreamer, and on occasions, quite charming.  Nevertheless, I often ask Spirit to keep His arms around my shoulder and His hand over my mouth.  My heroes range from Henry David Thoreau to Sheldon Cooper, and I always have time to watch Big Bang Theory or Under the Tuscan Sun.  I am a pragmatic romantic and a consummate lover of ideas and words, nature and time.  My beloved husband and our three rambunctious cocker spaniels are the souls that populate my heart. I could spend the rest of my life restoring our Victorian home, planting tomatoes, and lying under coconut palms on tropical sands.  I believe in Spirit, and have zero tolerance for irresponsibility, victim’s mentalities, political and religious orthodoxy, and intentional cruelty.  I am always on the look-out for friends, people who find that life just doesn’t get any better than breaking bread together and finding humor in the world around us.

Solitude by Ray S.

“Hear that? It’s Debussy’s Le Mer.” How appropriate for the moment. Sounds just the way I feel. It is so hard to get started in the morning, the prospects of managing another day’s routine and decisions nagging at my subconscious.

“Subconscious, why do you command so much energy of my old mind? We are always at swords point or you’ve taken over completely. You’re the victor and I’m the defeated. You revel in the worst negative. O, these quiet hours of solitude.”

And then I said, “Well, how did you know when your retreat into self-imposed isolation would result in the discovery of your real self.” Did it settle all of those damning self-doubts? I guess it did, it is hard for me to imagine you any different than you are now. How long did it take in meditation or whatever to lift that millstone from your back? Can you show me how? I don’t think I have the will or discipline to beat my evil twin.

The music swells and I envision a soul departing this vail of all it demands. See it rising into the sky like a balloon, oh feel the relief from escaping everything earthly. What an adventure. The vastness of the universe beckons. Maybe this soul will be drown to all the other family of soul that took this trip earlier. How about that. A family reunion. It might be crowded.

OMG. Will this all end up the same old, same old? No, remember you left all that sub conscious junk back there. You’ll just have to be patient.

Sounds like the sea has crashed it’s final crescendo and the two battling sub-consciousnesses have given up until tomorrow morning, ready for another go at whatever.

How do you know anything, when, how, where, why? Solitude can be so tired, deadly and lonely.

And then there comes another melody with words:

“Never treats; me sweet and gentle, the way he should.
I’ve got it bad and that ain’t good
Lord above me make him love me the way he should
I’ve got it bad and that ain’t good!

I end up like I start out,
Just crying my heart out.
I’ve got it bad and that ain’t good.

(With apologies to Earl Father Hines.)

© 30 September
2013

About the
Author