Tag: New Jersey

In the New Jersey
suburb where I grew up there was very little diversity in the groups of people
to whom I had any exposure.  My friends
and family, my parents friends, and most of the people in our community were
white and Christian.  Black people entered
our community to do work for the white people–always house work, child care,
or yard work.  This was the extent of my
exposure.

Later in the early
1950’s we moved to the Deep South.  My
eyes were immediately opened to not only the presence of an entire culture made
up of black people, but also to the injustices and insults that routinely were
dealt them.  In Louisiana at the time
everything was highly segregated. I have to say that the denial of access to
public services, stores, parks, recreational facilities, schools, some jobs, etc.
was indeed shocking. This was the highly valued way of life in the South, they
declared.  Always had been, and always
would be.  Everyone, white and black,
wished it to be so, I was told. Every man knew his place in that culture and
every man was content with the status quo. 
Why ever change it?  It worked for
everyone, didn’t it?

I left the Deep South
after three years in high school.  I left
for college and I deliberately chose to leave that part of the world.  I never felt like I belonged.

Given this deeply
entrenched way of life it is no wonder that when I returned to Louisiana to
attend my step-mother’s funeral two decades after the civil rights legislation
had gone into effect, I discovered that what had changed was that many public
facilities had become private, thus giving legality to excluding certain people
from entry.  One positive change,
however, that I observed was that many skilled labor positions previously reserved
only for whites were now occupied by black people.

In college as a student
of sociology I learned that there were three races. White, black, and
yellow.  Detailed studies had been done
to describe the respective features of each race.  The implication, if not the direct message,
was that each race would retain its own distinctive features, and would always
be identifiable if the individuals of each race kept to themselves.  Of course, there was no mention of any social
inequities among the three races–no mention of unequal rights.

Then came the civil
rights movement of the 1960’s.  Being
occupied as a new mother at that time, I did not become active in the movement
except for cheering for the civil rights advocates and mostly observing what
was happening.  I saw that John Kennedy
was on was I deemed to be the right side, so I switched sides and became a
Democrat.  There were Republicans on the
side of justice, too, but they were working much too slowly and not making
enough noise.  Kennedy and later LBJ, became my heroes.

When we moved to Denver
in 1970 I observed a much more multiracial society than I had seen in
Rochester, NY or anywhere else.  Blacks,
Asians, Latinos, and whites all going about their daily business together.  At least on a given day in down town Denver
it appeared that way.  We chose to live
in Park Hill neighborhood because it was an “integrated neighborhood.”  True, it was integrated to some extent.  Apparently those who did not want to live in
an integrated community had been part of the “white flight” that had taken
place years earlier.

I soon began working
for the Girl Scout Council after we became settled in Denver.  The mission of the organization at the time
was to serve the entire community. 
Although the mission was not written as such, those of us in the membership
Department knew it meant we were to change our image from a white christian
organization to that of a multiracial organization with spiritual values not
identified with any specific religion–but all inclusive.  The traditional image of the Girl Scouts is
that it is an organization for   white,
Christian women and girls.  Although in
truth, my experience has been that the organization has always been pro-active
when it comes to including all races, religions, and socio-economic
groups.  In fact, during my 22 year
career with GS Mile Hi Council, a huge part of my job was to see that the Girl
Scout experience was delivered the to girls of all ethnic, racial, and
socioeconomic groups.  For example, I
remember planning how to approach a newly established community of Vietnamese
immigrants to assure them that the Girl Scout organization welcomes their
girls.  Of course, there was no way to do
this successfully at the time.  It would
take a couple of generations before the families had any interest in joining
our ranks.

We have always had a
multiracial staff at the Girl Scouts. 
When I first hired on, my supervisor was an African-American woman.  When she left for greener GS pastures in the
National Council Office, of course I got a new boss.  This time a woman of Hispanic descent. Many
of our board members, the real bosses, and many volunteers who carry out the
programs have been women of color.  When
I became a team leader my staff was multiracial.  In fact, at one time, of the seven of us,
three were white.

My grandfather was a
reasonable man, a wise man.  However he
was a product of his generation and a bit misguided when it came to racial
issues. I remember arguing with him about the injustice of racial inequalities
in our society. My parents had instilled in me a strong sense of justice.
Because of that and, I am sure, because I was becoming sensitive to the feeling
of being different when in the minority, I could not accept my grandfather’s
ideas and had to tell him so.    For me
life was easy though.  My difference
could be hidden; it did not show up in the color of my skin. (Furthermore I had
escaped the dreaded queer-o-meter at birth.)

I have a so-called
multiracial family.  I recently came
across a photo of my daughter with her partner at the time, a black man from
Africa, and my son and his new Asian wife from China.  In another photo next to it, sits my oldest
daughter and her partner of 15 years, an African American woman who calls me
“Mom.”  My younger daughter later married
a black man from Cuba.

Let me tell you about
the importance the concept of race has for me. 
What comes to my mind when someone mentions the word “race” are the
following memorable and multiple experiences: the high school track team, NASTAR
ski racing at Winter Park, a race against my aging body on a cross country
bicycling trip, a swim-bike-run triathlon at Cherry Creek State Park, the Race
for the Cure, and the Cherry Creek Sneak.

© 16 April 2013

About the Author 

 Betsy has been active in the GLBT community
including PFLAG, the Denver women’s chorus, OLOC (Old Lesbians Organizing for
Change).  She has been retired from the
Human Services field for about 15 years. 
Since her retirement, her major activities include tennis, camping,
traveling, teaching skiing as a volunteer instructor with National Sports
Center for the Disabled, and learning. 
Betsy came out as a lesbian after 25 years of marriage. She has a close
relationship with her three children and enjoys spending time with her four
grandchildren.  Betsy says her greatest
and most meaningful enjoyment comes from sharing her life with her partner of
25 years, Gillian Edwards.