My Most Meaningful Vacation, by Betsy

So, what is it that makes a vacation meaningful anyway? I can’t honestly think of any vacation that I have ever taken that was not meaningful. Some maybe were more meaningful than others that is definitely true. I will have to focus on vacations of the last, say, 50 years. Choosing from all the vacations of my lifetime is too overwhelming. My memory just isn’t that good.
I have had a few trips abroad—the heart of Europe as well as remote places like the Orkney Islands off the north coast of Scotland, the train trip through South Africa, plus visits to Canada, Mexico, and Central America. All these trips were memorable and certainly meaningful. Simply experiencing other cultures, and other ways of life is about the best educational experience a person can have. We learn from living among or simply observing others that our way is not the only way.  Our language is not the only language, our humor is not the only kind of humor, our cuisine is not the only kind.
My idea of a great vacation is an exploit filled with excitement, new experiences, and adventure.  I have traveled on vacation by plane, train, boat, car, bicycle, and on foot. One of my most memorable “vacations” was cycling across the United States, from Pacific to Atlantic. I have written several stories about that trip which I took in 2005.
The thing about traveling by bicycle is that you see so much more detail along the way, including the wildlife, sometimes in the form of road kill.
Probably most of my vacations have been of the camping variety. I love camping whether in the wilderness or just off the highway.
When I was married to Bill and the three children were young, we used to take backpacking trips. Bill was always looking for fishing opportunities. I hated fishing. Not enough action. But there was plenty for all of us to do on those adventures while Bill was fishing. I very much enjoyed the hiking, setting up camp,  and being in the mountain environment with nature.
When Gill and I first got together we went backpacking one summer in the Wind River Range in Wyoming.  That was the time she cut a gash in her knee and I saved her from bleeding to death with my Girl Scout first aid kit which happened to have some butterfly bandages in it. She still has a scar on her knee today which I want to pass around the table for all of you to see.
This, one of our first vacations together, could have been meaningful in that it had the potential for being our last vacation together.  But Gill stuck with me in spite of the fact that it was not her idea of a vacation. I actually think it was the butterfly bandages that saved our relationship.
After we had been together a short time, we went to a style of camping more to her liking—car camping. Gill had a VW camper van—a Westphalia— in which we had taken some day trips during our courtship. It may not have been an actual vacation, rather a weekend, when we took the Westy to Rocky Mountain National Park. This was a meaningful trip to me, and I will never forget it. It definitely portended of a meaningful ritual which would become a part of my life every day for the rest of my life. We were driving along through the park admiring the sights when Gill pulled over off the road and came to a stop. “It’s tea time,” she wailed. She jumped into the back, opened the galley, put the kettle on and brewed the tea, and served me a dainty cup of perfect British tea—with milk, of course, not cream.  I am a person who likes structure and some rituals. So, I became hooked on four o’clock tea time for life.
I also became quite enamored of the idea of a camper van for road trips. The Westy was very old and worn out and had to go soon after we started living together. But we both were enthusiastic about having a camping vehicle. So, a few years after selling the Westy we bought a used VW Eurovan—a later model of the Westphalia.  We named her Brunie, short for Brunhilda. She was a big boned woman. The three of us —Gill, Brunie, and I—spent 13 years together, traveled over 200,000 miles in too many trips to count. It was an awesome relationship. All of our vacations together were meaningful because we traveled in almost every state, except Hawaii and Alaska, always had a comfortable place to sleep, we felt safe, and were always warm and dry. Because of Brunie we saw the country, we learned history and geology, we experienced things and places we never dreamed existed. I might add we met all kinds of people who would always approach us in the campground wanting to meet us? No wanting a look at Brunie. 
Some of the more memorable places we visited had been selected as a destination like the national parks, state parks, oceanside settings, historical sites, desert oases.  Others we just happened upon by chance.  We always kept a diary on these trips because we knew as we grew older we would forget where it was that we saw that amazing sunrise, that moose grazing beside the road, those sheep on the cliff above, that approaching tornado. Or all we had, learned, heard, and experienced would become blurred.  And Gill was constantly snapping photos, so we have thousands of those to remind us. Some places were quite ordinary, some elaborate, some filled us with awe, some sights were beautiful beyond imagination, some curious, but not one was not worth the visit. Some of our favorite, nearby places we have been back to several times such as Hovenweep, Canyonlands, Hamburger Rock, Arches N.P., and  Yellowstone.
There has not been one trip or sojourn that was not meaningful.  Most meaningful? Impossible to say.
© 1 Dec 2017 
About the Author 
Betsy has been active in
the GLBT community including PFLAG, the Denver Women’s Chorus, OLOC (Old
Lesbians Organizing for Change), and the GLBT Community Center. She has been
retired from the human services field for 20 years. Since her retirement, her major
activities have included tennis, camping, traveling, teaching skiing as a
volunteer instructor with the National Sports Center for the Disabled, reading,
writing, and learning. Betsy came out as a lesbian after 25 years of marriage.
She has a close relationship with her three children and four grandchildren.
Betsy says her greatest and most meaningful enjoyment comes from sharing her
life with her partner of 30 years, Gillian Edwards.

My Most Meaningful Vacation, by Betsy

So what is it that makes
a vacation meaningful anyway? I can’t honestly think of any vacation that I
have ever taken that was not meaningful. Some maybe were more meaningful than
others that is definitely true. I will have to focus on vacations of the last,
say, 50 years. Choosing from all the vacations of my lifetime is too
overwhelming. My memory just isn’t that good.
I have had a few trips
abroad—the heart of Europe as well as remote places like the Orkney Islands off
the north coast of Scotland, the train trip through South Africa, plus visits
to Canada, Mexico, and Central America. All these trips were memorable and
certainly meaningful. Simply experiencing other cultures, and other ways of
life is about the best educational experience a person can have. We learn from
living among or simply observing others that our way is not the only way.  Our language is not the only language, our
humor is not  the only kind of humor, our
cuisine is not the only kind.
My idea of a great
vacation is an exploit filled with excitement, new experiences, and
adventure.  I have traveled on vacation
by plane, train, boat, car, bicycle, and on foot. One of my most memorable
“vacations” was cycling across the United States, from Pacific to Atlantic. I
have written several stories about that trip which I took in 2005.
The thing about traveling
by bicycle is that you see so much more detail along the way, including the
wild life, sometimes in the form of road kill.
Probably most of my
vacations have been of the camping variety. I love camping whether in the
wilderness or just off the highway.
When I was married to
Bill and the three children were young, we used to take back packing trips.
Bill was always looking for fishing opportunities. I hated fishing. Not enough
action. But there was plenty for all of us to do on those adventures while Bill
was fishing. I very much enjoyed the hiking, setting up camp,  and being in the mountain environment with
nature.
When Gill and I first got
together we went back packing one summer in the Wind River Range in
Wyoming.  That was the time she cut a
gash in her knee and I saved her from bleeding to death with my Girl Scout
first aid kit which happened to have some butterfly bandages in it. She still
has a scar on her knee today which I want to pass around the table for all of
you to see.
This, one of our first
vacations together, could have been meaningful in that it had the potential for
being our last vacation together.  But
Gill stuck with me in spite of the fact that it was not her idea of a vacation.
I actually think it was the butterfly bandages that saved our relationship.
After we had been
together a short time, we went to a style of camping more to her liking—car
camping. Gill had a VW camper van—a Westphalia— in which we had taken some day
trips during our courtship. It may not have been an actual vacation, rather a
weekend, when we took the Westy to Rocky Mountain National Park. This was a
meaningful trip to me, and I will never forget it. It definitely portended of a
meaningful ritual which would become a part of my life everyday for the rest of
my life. We were driving along through the park admiring the sights when Gill
pulled over off the road and came to a stop. “It’s tea time,” she wailed. She
jumped into the back, opened the galley, 
put the kettle on and brewed the tea, and served me a dainty cup of
perfect British tea—with milk, of course, not cream.  I am a person who likes structure and some
rituals. So I became hooked on four o’clock tea time for life.
I also became quite
enamored of the idea of a camper van for road trips. The Westy was very old and
worn out and had to go soon after we started living together. But we both were
enthusiastic about having a camping vehicle. So a few years after selling the
Westy we bought a used VW Eurovan—a later model of the Westphalia.  We named her Brunie, short for Brunhilda. She
was a big boned woman. The three of us —Gill, Brunie, and I—spent 13  years together, travelled over 200,000 miles
in too many trips to count. It was an awesome relationship. All of our
vacations together were meaningful because we traveled in almost every state,
except Hawaii and Alaska, always had a comfortable place to sleep, we felt
safe, and were always warm and dry. Because of Brunie we saw the country, we
learned history and geology, we experienced things and places we never dreamed
existed. I might add we met all kinds of people who would always approach us in
the campground wanting to meet us? No wanting a look at Brunie. 
Some of the more memorable
places we visited had been selected as a destination like the national parks,
state parks, oceanside settings, historical sites, desert oases.  Others we just happened upon  by chance. 
We always kept a diary on these trips because we knew as we grew older
we would forget where it was that we saw that amazing sunrise, that moose
grazing beside the road, those sheep on the cliff above, that approaching
tornado. Or all we had, learned, heard, and experienced would become blurred.  And Gill was constantly snapping photos, so
we have thousands of those to remind us. Some places were quite ordinary, some
elaborate, some filled us with awe, some sights were beautiful beyond
imagination, some curious, but not one was not worth the visit. Some of our
favorite, nearby places we have been back to several times such as
Hovenweep,  Canyon lands,  Hamburger Rock, Arches N.P., and  Yellowstone.
There has not been one
trip or sojourn that was not meaningful. 
Most meaningful? Impossible to say.
© 1 Dec 2017 
About
the Author
 
Betsy has been active in
the GLBT community including PFLAG, the Denver Women’s Chorus, OLOC (Old
Lesbians Organizing for Change), and the GLBT Community Center. She has been
retired from the human services field for 20 years. Since her retirement, her major
activities have included tennis, camping, traveling, teaching skiing as a
volunteer instructor with the National Sports Center for the Disabled, reading,
writing, and learning. Betsy came out as a lesbian after 25 years of marriage.
She has a close relationship with her three children and four grandchildren.
Betsy says her greatest and most meaningful enjoyment comes from sharing her
life with her partner of 30 years, Gillian Edwards.

Road Trip by Gillian

I came honestly by my
addiction to road trips. I was introduced to them by my mum and dad. In Britain
during, and for years after, World War Two, private cars were relatively rare;
gas was severely rationed. But as we staggered into the fifties, our world
became a little brighter and Dad took his old car down off the blocks where it
had rested for a decade. He worked lovingly on it for some time, then lo and
behold suddenly one Sunday afternoon we were off to the Welsh mountains. Before
long the afternoon jaunts graduated to day excursions and thence to a week in
Cornwall and two weeks in Scotland. There was never any discussion of camping,
not a very attractive prospect in the wet cold British weather, but we were on
a low budget and stayed in small back-street B & B’s. These were nothing like their upscale
modern U.S. namesakes, but simply a spare room in a very modest house, usually
sharing the bathroom and breakfast with the owners. In this style we went to
many different parts of the country and met many interesting people.
Perhaps, had I not been
an only child, I would have hated these vacations and even the day trips the
way many modern kids hate spending hours in the car. But I had the luxury of
the back seat to myself, without noisy squabbling siblings to dig elbows in my
ribs or squash me against the door handle and demand the windows be open; or
closed. I never once recall asking, even silently in my own head, “Are we there
yet?” I think it was a safe and warm haven to me, shut away in this metal box,
just the three of us.
But it was my mother
who turned it from an OK activity to something I truly loved. Mum kept up
something of a running commentary as we passed through the farms and towns. She
loved history and regaled Dad and me, though he never responded except
occasionally to glance back at me in the rear-view mirror and wink, with
fascinating tidbits about different places; not boring things like dates but
little anecdotes. At the time I believed it all to be true, though looking back
I’m not completely
convinced, though she certainly was a very knowledgeable woman. Apart from
history, she would make up silly stories about a farm we just passed, or the
vicar of a village church, or the family in a car we met going the other way.
There were still not many cars on the roads then, so seeing one was just an
invitation to Mom’s
imagination. Most of all, she loved to laugh, and if there was nothing too
immediately amusing in the vicinity, she would create something. She made
herself giggle with some of her imagined stories, and she paid great attention
to license plates, making them into acronyms or rhymes.
My mother leaps up in
my memory quite often, and usually it’s
when something comes up that I know would have made her giggle. During football
games, for instance, not that I can imagine Mum ever enjoying football, but how
she would giggle at some of the commentary, when they say things like, “He wasn’t doing much when he was an Eagle, but
as a Panther he’s
really come into his own.” When she stopped her giggles she would then, I know,
weave some wonderful fairy story around this failed eagle which somehow morphed
into a more successful big cat.
Anyway, having made a
short story long, that was my introduction to road trips; followed, inevitable
by a hiatus of decades given over to work and family. Then, in celebration of a
new millennium, Betsy and I bought our VW camper van and embarked on our own
series of road trips. I haven’t
had time to count them up, but they must number around twenty-five for a total
time of maybe a year, though we rarely are away for more than three or four
weeks at a time.
We have been many
places from the Mexican border to, and into, Canada; and from coast to coast.
We have visited every one of the lower forty-eight states, and camped in most
of them.
We have seen sights we
had always wanted to see but not had the chance, and chanced upon things we had
no idea of. Unlike taking a plane, when the best you can possibly hope for is a
journey that is uneventful, road trips are never uneventful; nor do you want
them to be, though it’s
good when the wonderful surprises well outnumber the bad ones. We have of
course had our share of those less positive – flat tires both on the road and
in campgrounds, loading up in the morning all ready to go and the van won’t start; freeway accidents only narrowly
averted and near misses with tornadoes, hail storms, and forest fires.
I understand that one
day in the not too distant future one of us is going to reach the age where
camping road trips are not such an attractive option. It’s unclear at this time which of us will
reach that stage first, Betsy or me or Brunhilda as we call the van, mostly
though not always, with great affection. That will be a sad day, whatever the
reason. But one of the blessings of aging seems to be the ability to accept
with relative ease that the good times of the moment will inevitably come to an
end, but only to be replaced by other, different, good times. We can love
taking out our favorite memories and dusting them off for further enjoyment,
but at the same time always creating new ones while continuing, with luck, to
live without regrets. And I suspect that my most frequently re-visited
memories, as long as I’m
privileged to have memories, will be of oh those many road trips.
© 15 August 2014 
About
the Author 
I
was born and raised in England. After graduation from college there, I moved to
the U.S. and, having discovered Colorado, never left. I have lived in the
Denver-Boulder area since 1965, working for 30 years at IBM. I married, raised
four stepchildren, then got divorced after finally, in my forties, accepting
myself as a lesbian. I have now been with my wonderful partner Betsy for 25
years.